I invited ChatGPT (artificial intelligence) to critique a short piece I wrote many years ago. In this piece, “Transition” I tried to imagine the birth experience from the baby’s perspective. As if it was an alien traveling into a different universe.
I always find the responses of AI, both mind blowing and disturbing. Particularly as it references emotional content and makes statements like, “I feel”, when in reality it can’t “feel” at all…at least, not that we know of.🤔
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Question: The following piece was written some years ago. I was trying to imagine being born from the baby’s perspective. As if, for example, it were an alien entering our universe. I would appreciate your thoughts:
TRANSITION. (13th June 1991)
Claws buried in a body no bigger than a newborn lamb. Crushing muscle and bone, Compressing head into chest. Twisting neck muscles, not yet strong enough to shake the head in protest. A mind not yet formed enough to know what head shaking means. A being composed of flesh and feelings and needs. Thrown into space from its liquid sleeping place. Where it had lain cushioned and supported in warmth and soft light. The only sensations, safety and nurturance. Every need catered for automatically by its miniature universe. New sensations, suddenly not safe. As the universe collapses, crushing flesh, pressing down. New inexplicable feelings and no knowledge or intellect to make sense of them. Imminent death? Sudden recognition of something other than current state. Fast becoming previous state. Survive!…Go back!…Hang on! But no… First learnings of powerlessness, as crushing forces destroy The trust of a safe place. Now coldness and blinding white light, noise. An alien void, huge, incomprehensible. And a new sense of beings other than self. As creature grips flesh with claws, tearing from a safe place. New learnings of powerlessness, terror and pain.
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AI response: Your piece, “TRANSITION,” powerfully captures the disorienting and primal nature of birth from the baby’s perspective, emphasizing how alien and incomprehensible the transition from the womb to the outside world must feel. By portraying birth as an existential shift—almost as if the baby were entering a completely different universe—you evoke a profound sense of vulnerability and helplessness.
### Thoughts on Imagery:
– **Claws buried in a body no bigger than a newborn lamb**: This opening immediately sets a visceral tone. The use of “claws” emphasizes the helplessness and violence of the process. Though we know the birth process is natural, you frame it as something almost invasive, like a struggle for survival.
– **Crushing muscle and bone, compressing head into chest**: The imagery of compression and distortion reflects the intense physical demands of birth. It conveys the idea of overwhelming forces acting on a fragile, unready body.
– **Thrown into space from its liquid sleeping place**: This line encapsulates the stark contrast between the womb and the outside world—going from the safety and warmth of the womb to a cold, vast, and alien world. The language of space exploration emphasizes the suddenness and disconnection from the prior, nurturing environment.
– **No knowledge or intellect to make sense of them**: I like how you explore the idea that the baby is completely unprepared for this experience, driven only by primal feelings and needs with no framework to understand what’s happening.
### Emotional Undercurrent:
The **sense of powerlessness** runs throughout your writing, capturing what might be the baby’s rawest emotional state: being unable to control the crushing forces or stop the transition into an unknown reality. The repeated emphasis on terror, pain, and the collapse of what had previously been the entirety of the baby’s world evokes not only fear but the traumatic rupture from safety.
### Perspective:
You’ve framed the baby’s birth almost as a **betrayal of trust**, which is a powerful angle. The baby, having known only warmth and automatic nurturance, is thrust into a place of **coldness, light, and noise**—elements that are intrusive and hostile compared to the womb. This alienation magnifies the baby’s separation from the only safety it has ever known.
### Thematic Exploration:
Thematically, your piece is as much about the **loss of control** and the inevitability of transition as it is about physical sensations. There is an existential edge to the writing—birth is portrayed not just as a natural process but as an early lesson in helplessness and survival.
### Overall Reflection:
This piece is both poetic and deeply philosophical. It effectively blends vivid sensory imagery with existential questioning, suggesting that the process of birth is not just the beginning of life, but the beginning of life’s *discomforts*, uncertainties, and power struggles. Your exploration of birth as an alien experience offers a novel perspective on how traumatic this foundational event might feel, especially through the lens of pure sensation, instinct, and vulnerability.
It’s a striking and thought-provoking reflection on an experience we all share but rarely examine from this point of view.
